June 2013 - Matt Ralston's Blog

What the 2013 NBA Championship Means for LeBron’s Legacy 1

Jun

21

2013

Here’s how this conversation will go for future generations pondering the greats of the NBA: “So, what do you think about LeBron James legacy?” The subject sits cowered in the corner. We haven’t seen the sun for weeks, only a yellow haze that barely diffuses through the thick benzene ridden smog, and particles of plastic, ...

Corporate America Thinks You’re a Moron and So Does the NSA 2

Jun

21

2013

Although most people have known since the Patriot Act passed that the NSA has been spying on regular American citizens, the scope of their prying wasn’t fully known until recently, when it came out that Verizon, along with virtually all other telecom companies, are sharing data with the government and probably allowing them to listen ...

When to Rob Someone at the ATM 3

Jun

20

2013

Today I walked to the ATM at the Bank of America on Sunset. As I was walking through the long parking lot, a guy got out of his car and started walking up to the machine, so we both approached it, with him being about two steps ahead of me as we closed in on ...

Prostitution – The World’s Oldest Profession

Jun

18

2013

Someone recently told me that Prostitution is the oldest profession. I don’t understand how this could be the case If prostitution is the act of exchanging sex for money, how could it be the oldest profession? Where was the money coming from to pay them? Clearly a profession must have existed for dudes to have ...

Tips on How to Read an Article on the Net 1

Jun

15

2013

I don’t know about you, but I always find it is good to brush up on my academic fundamentals. A Professor friend of mine passed this along and I just thought I would share it. How to Read an Article. 1) First you have to read the first two sentences. There is no getting around ...

Why Phil Jackson is Annoying

Jun

13

2013

Phil Jackson is annoying for a variety of reasons, but above all, it is probably his squinty smugness that really rubs me the wrong way. Why does Phil Jackson think he is so awesome? Because he has won eleven NBA Championships. Which, if you’re going to choose to act bemused at humanity, is probably a ...

Escaping Emanent Death Part I

Jun

12

2013

I remember the first time I drove from Seattle to Los Angeles. Heading South on the 5, my plan was to then pick up Hwy. 101, which I knew I could hit right around the California and Oregon boarder. So, once I got to the boarder I decided to look at a map, because back ...

Rednecks and Death Threats 5

Jun

12

2013

From my experience, rednecks are the only group of people that will insult you if you haven’t really asked for it. I think this is because they’re bullies who have always had the upper hand when dealing with other groups of people. And they embrace being stupid which leads them to really believe that they’re ...

Firemen are Annoying 2

Jun

6

2013

What’s the first thing you think of when you imagine Los Angeles? The Walk of Fame? Parties? Film studios? For me, the first thing I now think about are sirens. Jesus there are a lot of sirens in L.A. You can’t walk down the street without an ambulance or a fire truck barreling through the ...

Matt’s Hot Sauce Review

Jun

2

2013

I don’t know about you, but for me nothing enhances the flavor of a delicious dish more than a spicy hot sauce. Whether its pizza, pasta, Mexican or authentic sushi, a little Frank’s Red Hot or Louisiana Pepper Sauce really does the trick. But there are a lot of options. Below I break down the ...