Tiger Woods issued a statement taking great pains to explain that he wasn’t drunk when he was found asleep in his smashed up car on the freeway. Well, that’s a relief. I would hate to think people under the influence of a drug strong enough to induce a mini coma were under the influence of alcohol. ...

A lot of my friends growing up were Eskimos. There aren’t a lot of people who can say that. I realize the term Eskimo has recently come under fire, as I have experienced first hand by a lot of heroic white people who have never met an Eskimo informing me that they prefer to be called Inuits now. ...

The date is May 4, 2017. The president of the United States is a shitty reality show host with a poor vocabulary. He’s not a self made man, yet is incapable of realizing everyone’s dad didn’t give them ten million dollars. His wife is a Soviet Bloc prostitute. She lives in a building sporting his own ...

Brie Larson will be playing Captain Marvel in an upcoming film, likely to be followed by several shitty sequels. This makes Captain Marvel the first female Marvel character to have a stand-alone film, and comes on the heels of an upcoming Wonder Woman reboot. The general consensus is that we need more women playing superheroes. This ...

The face wound has long been a cinematic trope for illustrating physical harm. It’s symbolic of greater physical torment.We are to assume that for every cut or gash a person has on their face, that their entire being is suffering ten times over. Your face has a relatively small surface area, and in a combat situation ...