Sex Archives - Matt Ralston's Blog

The Daily Mail Is Killing Me

Aug

2

2018

Here is a list of true, not fake, news items which happened this week and are headlines on the front page of the Daily Mail, which is an unreliable publication, but these things are all actually true: Steve Jobs, a man admired by many, emotionally abused his only daughter on a serial basis, according to ...

Prostitution – The World’s Oldest Profession

Jun

18

2013

Someone recently told me that Prostitution is the oldest profession. I don’t understand how this could be the case If prostitution is the act of exchanging sex for money, how could it be the oldest profession? Where was the money coming from to pay them? Clearly a profession must have existed for dudes to have ...

Amazing Entrepreneurial Ideas Part II

Apr

2

2013

I have so many amazing entrepreneurial ideas that I even amaze myself. Please message me if you are interested in investing (I don’t deal with sums less than one million U.S. dollars.) 1) Peanut Butter tubs. Can someone explain to me why peanut butter comes in that tall slender jar? Its hard to get the ...

The Worst Quotes Ever

Mar

22

2013

The following are the worst quotes I’ve ever heard. These are all true, and all were said by people I know. Here we go: 1) “Without doors, there are no buildings.” My friend Simon, who sells doors wholesale to commercial developments. He was a little flustered as people were making fun of him, and thus said one ...

The Weirdest Thing That has Ever Happened.

Mar

17

2013

The following is a true account of the weirdest thing that ever happened to me. This isn’t the most notable or exciting thing that has happened to me. Its just the weirdest. I went to visit my friend Cory in eastern Washington and we took a trip to Pullman. Home of Washington State University. And ...

The Most Underrated Events Ever 1

Mar

14

2013

Given a lot of over hyped coverage about something as trivial as a new pope, I thought it would be fun to do a report on the most underrated events ever. As Americans, we’re constantly exposed to a television news presence which reports on idiotic nonsense like Miley Cyrus and ignores relevant information such as ...

How to get a Rub and Tug 3

Feb

23

2013

Sometimes things happen that really throw you for a loop, such as learning how to get a rub and tug. A few weeks ago I had a lapse in judgement and did a cannonball into a kiddy pool, landing right on my back. I was in pain. I needed a massage. I’d never had one ...