We all know that government corn subsidies are an unfounded and dangerous policy which has led to an abundance of cheap and nutritionally lacking food. How else would it be possible for a cheeseburger to cost 99 cents? Its because corn is used in nearly all ingredients of a fast-food burger. The beef – corn fed, and laden with corn ‘filler.’ The bun – corn. The ketchup – full of corn syrup. The tomatoes – those are corn. The lettuce – also corn.
It is a dangerous precedent, and we are seeing more and more products being made of corn – even household products such as makeup, diapers, and toothpaste contain corn. But the really dangerous precedent being set is that people are now being manufactured out of corn.
Since 2003, the government has made at least a billion people out of corn. They exist mostly to further the government’s policy of making everything out of corn. The following are a few notable examples:
1) Dr. Drew. It is a well established fact that Dr. Drew was spawned out of a corn silo sometime between 1892 and 1980. Dr. Drew’s job is to further the corn agenda in a variety of ways. First of all, people with vitamin deficiencies linked to corn tend to develop what is called a frown face. It is most common in obese Southern women, but people of all types can be effected. Dr. Drew’s main purpose is to walk around with a pretend frown face to make it seem like it isn’t a big deal, and also to aggressively promote anti-depressant drugs on television (for which he has received payouts) to treat the various mood disorders that come along with being obese and malnourished – the causes of which are 90% corn related.
2) Oprah Winfrey. Oprah’s body is made of 75% corn filler, and the rest is durum wheat flour. It is believed that the government’s Corn Initiative created Oprah to spoon feed a bunch of empty garbage into the mouths of people who were already eating a lot of corn in order to distract them from the corn they had been consuming. It has been remarked that Oprah is very similar to the government in this way.
3) Bono. Bono was made of corn in order to spread the government’s policy of subsidizing corn to other parts of the globe – mainly Africa. However, while Bono was being baked into his current shape, something went horribly wrong, and Bono rebelled against his creators while in his muffin pan. The film The Matrix is actually based on this – just replace Neo with Corn.
These are just a few examples of people made of corn. The program is actually self-serving, as corn and corn seem to mix pretty well.
Any time you see someone who looks like they may have been created from ‘filler’ – meaning bland, and a touch processed, the odds are that they are part of the government’s Corn Initiative.
But don’t worry, like actual junk food, these people are fine in moderation.