Gun Arguments and Why they’re Stupid

Americans have been dying from guns by the droves for a long time. This fact didn’t really resonate with White America, however, until white people started being killed by the masses in public places. I call this the Cedric Ceballos Effect. Ceballos was a pretty good player who would occasionally erupt for fifty-point games. He’s still ...

Why NBA Contracts Encourage Players to be Assholes

NBA contracts are real annoying. The NBA has fewer players on each team than any other league in professional sports besides golf, which has hundreds of fat loners. Consequently NBA contracts boast perks not seen in other sports, and the worst of these is the mandatory guarantee clause – which is what the blue-collar sector would know as workmen’s comp ...

Amazing Entrepreneurial Ideas Part II

I have so many amazing entrepreneurial ideas that I even amaze myself. Please message me if you are interested in investing (I don’t deal with sums less than one million U.S. dollars.) 1) Peanut Butter tubs. Can someone explain to me why peanut butter comes in that tall slender jar? Its hard to get the ...

Why NFL Concussions are Awesome

The NFL continues to soar in popularity – and I personally love the hard-nosed gridiron action, and more than anything else, I love NFL concussions. NFL concussions are by far the most exciting single play in all of football. Nothing epitomizes the hard-hitting action of American football more than a guy temporarily losing consciousness and then developing ...

My Most Recent Amazing Entrepreneurial Ideas 1

The following are a list of earth-shattering entrepreneurial ideas that I have come up with in the last day or so. Let this record show that I am the sole creator of these ideas unless otherwise noted. If anyone is interested in financing any of these, please contact me (no Wall-Street types please.) Here we ...

Why there aren’t more Black Quarterbacks in the NFL 212

Why there aren't more Black Quarterbacks in the NFL
Just had an argument with a good friend regarding the racial makeup of  NFL positions: I find it odd that, given the NFL consists of 69 percent black players, and 30 percent white, that the most important position in all of sports consists of only 21 percent black quarterbacks. Why the discrepancy? I will tell you. American football is ...

Why I’m Glad Oprah’s not Polluting the Airwaves Anymore 4

Remember that real annoying thing that happened a few years back, which everyone isn’t quite asking “what the fuck?” about enough? I’m not talking about about Creed or My Big Fat Greek Wedding, I’m talking about Oprah. The aptly-titled The Oprah Show show was a constant source of annoyance for decent Americans between the years ...

The Worst Quotes Ever

The following are the worst quotes I’ve ever heard. These are all true, and all were said by people I know. Here we go: 1) “Without doors, there are no buildings.” My friend Simon, who sells doors wholesale to commercial developments. He was a little flustered as people were making fun of him, and thus said one ...

All you Need to Know about LA Clubs 1

So, its Saturday night and you’re a douchebag who has no tangible social network – so its time to hit a club – but not just any club, an LA club. LA clubs have a lot to offer. Lines, overpriced drinks, various strains of herpes, and most of all utter disdain for you. In a ...

Why Humans Destroy Everything 10

Why do humans destroy everything they touch? The more I live on this planet, the more I’m surprised at how much humans suck, and I’m starting to think that humans are evil in general. Here are a few examples of how humans destroy societies with their selfish, short-sighted egos. Jesus, humans suck. 1) Humans on a daily basis, ...
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