matt ralston

Elon Musk Is Not A Genius

Elon Musk Is Not A Genius
I’ve long suspected Elon Musk of being a total fraud and I think we’re at the point that this can be confirmed. He’s a cult of personality, and a self-promoter. He talks a big game. But, there is zero evidence on record of him being a genius in any way. I think of him as ...

How The Hawaiian Volcano Made Me Realize People Are Easily Duped by the Media

How The Hawaiian Volcano Made Me Realize People Are Easily Duped by the Media
I travelled to the Big Island of Hawaii twice in the past few months, during the time its Kilauea volcano was erupting and CNN was live streaming the geyser of molten lava spewing up from the ground, when salacious headlines like Peril in Hawaii were exceedingly common. As you would imagine, these media outlets offered ...

So, Trump Thinks Paul Manafort is a “Very Good Person” ?!?!

So, Trump Thinks Paul Manafort is a
If you’re still a Trump supporter at this point you either lack the capacity for critical thought or have been brainwashed by Fox News into firm denial in the face of the facts. A lot of this is pride and ego. The President of the United States is publicly kissing the ass of Vladimir Putin. ...

How A Beer Site Could Fix Political Discourse

How A Beer Site Could Fix Political Discourse
A few days ago I bought some beer from Trader Joe’s called The Hemperor, and I found it absolutely nauseating. It’s an IPA brewed with hemp by the New Belgium Brewing Company, and it tastes like a dirty hippie’s van seat. I’m not a beer snob, or a beer nerd for that matter, but this ...

Why Nurses Are Gross

Why Nurses Are Gross
I never understood the old-timey trope regarding the Hot Nurse. I’m pretty sure it originated during the first and especially the second world war, when domestic women dropped everything and enlisted themselves to do whatever they could to help out the cause. This entailed listening to some inured jackass talk endlessly about himself whilst pretending ...

What Trump Fans Are Saying About the Paul Manafort Trial

What Trump Fans Are Saying About the Paul Manafort Trial
Hillary. In a word, that’s what Trump supporters are saying about the Manafort trial when you bring up the fact that Donald Trump’s former campaign chairman is on trial for conspiracy against the United States, for failing to register himself as a foreign agent, and for money laundering. The money he was laundering was paid ...

The Daily Mail Is Killing Me

The Daily Mail Is Killing Me
Here is a list of true, not fake, news items which happened this week and are headlines on the front page of the Daily Mail, which is an unreliable publication, but these things are all actually true: Steve Jobs, a man admired by many, emotionally abused his only daughter on a serial basis, according to ...

It’s Plausible The Demi Lovato Overdose is a Promotion Stunt

It's Plausible The Demi Lovato Overdose is a Promotion Stunt
In September of 2016 I noticed a mainstream media story, which was just one of those filler bullshit clickbait articles that nobody really thinks about, especially the people getting paid to publish them, and it stated “Demi Lovato now co-owns the rehab center where she received treatment.” Immediately many alarm bells went off. Such as, ...

The Big3 League Could Be NBA Jam

The Big3 League Could Be NBA Jam
From my perspective, the Big3 league has made one fatal error – being half court. I can’t take half court basketball seriously. Regardless of the talent I can’t shake the feeling I’m watching a bunch of guys get a lunch workout in at the YMCA. Every time someone takes the ball out I die a ...

You’re An Adult, Carry Some Goddamn Cash

You're An Adult, Carry Some Goddamn Cash
I’ve recently come into contact with several people in their thirties who openly proclaim that they “don’t carry cash.” Allow me to explain something to you people: You’re annoying. At worst, I think many of these people are freeloaders and have concocted this plan to save money. Not having cash means that at some point ...