Hillary Clinton, Basta!


Hillary Clinton’s hispandering is increasingly patronizing to Latinos in my opinion. She was recently discussing Donald Trump’s shameless race bating on the issue:

“I called him out when he was calling Mexicans racist. When he was engaging in rhetoric that I found deeply offensive, I said Basta…”

Basta means ‘stop it’ or ‘cut it out’ or something similar in Spanish. I had to look it up. Weird that Hillary had it on the tip of her tongue, since she’s whiter than a Tillamook and Wonderbread sandwich.

The reason nobody actually likes Hillary Clinton is that she’s cringingly inauthentic. She’s the type of person who would take an informal poll of meat preference before throwing a barbecue and weigh that against cost ratio. Then she’d sit there maniacally laughing with smoke in her eyes drinking the same Bud Light for three hours.

She never said Basta before she said it on stage. Someone told her to say that she said Basta. I did some informal research and slid Basta into a few conversations with some Mexicans I know. They looked at me like I was a wearing a Che Guevara shirt and repeating a Spanish Google Translate passage of Tupac’s Strictly 4 my Niggaz.

This is ironic because Trump’s popularity stems in part from his candidness and perceived lack of calculation. He appears to be saying whatever comes off the top of his head, because he often is. Granted it has no substance, but neither do his supporters.

But people appreciate it. I appreciate it on its face. Unfortunately it has manifested itself as hate speech and has increasingly appealed to a constituency of poor white trash who are pissed at people who work harder than them. Roll Tide.

The same thing people like about Trump they find revolting about Clinton. Trump has become increasingly calculated, meaning he nailed down his talking points on the fly and is hiring people to help him stay on message. Yet he appears human enough for it not to show. This is a skill which cannot be programmed.

When Clinton peppers her rehearsed anecdotes with index card imperatives gleaned from consulting firms at $2,500 a pop, it reaffirms what we already know, she’s an empty vessel. At least Trump is full of something.

It’s possible Hillary will secure enough Superdelegate votes, meaning career douchebags with her shared financial interests, to win the Democractic nomination. A morality play of the unlikeable corrupt candidate vs. the loathsome antihero will ensue. It would be close, and with enough variables could lead to a Trump presidency. The Democrats would have brought it on themselves.

Bernie Sanders is Trump. Just the authentic embodiment on the completely opposite side of decency. That’s what people are leaning towards. Basta with this shit, take a cue. Not sure how to say that in Spanish.

 

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Matt Ralston is a comedian and writer based in Los Angeles. Follow him on Twitter @MatthewRalston

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