{"id":4043,"date":"2020-12-07T21:48:04","date_gmt":"2020-12-07T21:48:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mattralston.net\/?p=4043"},"modified":"2020-12-07T21:49:21","modified_gmt":"2020-12-07T21:49:21","slug":"melania-trump-adds-to-her-legacy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mattralston.net\/politics\/melania-trump-adds-to-her-legacy\/","title":{"rendered":"Melania Trump Adds To Her Legacy"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Pretending to understand things.<\/p><\/div>\n

Slovenian horror movie ghoul Melania Trump has added to her formidable list of accomplishments as first lady by building a tennis pavilion.<\/p>\n

To be fair, she didn’t actually build it, but she did oversee the planning of it, if you believe in conspiracies. She also posed for a non-pornographic photo of herself wearing a hard hat while looking at some architectural drafts and nodding with the enthusiasm of someone reading the Terms and Conditions of their Verizon plan.<\/p>\n

The tennis pavilion is 1,200 square feet, so, the size of a $200,000 house in Boise.<\/p>\n

Melania has also commissioned her interior decorator to decorate the puny structure. It should be noted that she holds no job, and this would entail, liberally speaking, a thirty minute phone call.<\/p>\n

It would go something like this:<\/p>\n

Melania Trump: I like white couch.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Klonopin Ridden Frizzy Haired Decorator: Okay, yeah, totally.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Melania Trump: Tan couch, also make nice couch for sit.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Klonopin Ridden Frizzy Haired Decorator: You really have a knack for this.<\/em><\/p>\n

This isn’t the first of the ostensibly worthless Melania Trump’s accomplishments as first lady. Quite the contrary – she has allowed people with jobs to renovate the Rose Garden, approved some Christmas decorations, and wore a jacket that pissed on poor detained Mexican children. She also has all of the working female biological parts.<\/p>\n

As far as activism goes, she “runs” a campaign against cyber bullying, which from what I can see has consisted of her tweeting like five things about it. Again, she has no job, and this would cumulatively take, liberally speaking, thirty minutes.<\/p>\n

It is also ironic that she would choose this subject while being married to a professional cyber bully, although we all know this is not a real marriage and that he is a pathetic man-boy and she is a Slovenian whore.<\/p>\n

Here are some interesting facts about the White House:<\/p>\n