A lot of my friends growing up were Eskimos. There aren’t a lot of people who can say that. I realize the term Eskimo has recently come under fire, as I have experienced first hand by a lot of heroic white people who have never met an Eskimo informing me that they prefer to be called Inuits now. ...

The date is May 4, 2017. The president of the United States is a shitty reality show host with a poor vocabulary. He’s not a self made man, yet is incapable of realizing everyone’s dad didn’t give them ten million dollars. His wife is a Soviet Bloc prostitute. She lives in a building sporting his own ...

Brie Larson will be playing Captain Marvel in an upcoming film, likely to be followed by several shitty sequels. This makes Captain Marvel the first female Marvel character to have a stand-alone film, and comes on the heels of an upcoming Wonder Woman reboot. The general consensus is that we need more women playing superheroes. This ...

The face wound has long been a cinematic trope for illustrating physical harm. It’s symbolic of greater physical torment.We are to assume that for every cut or gash a person has on their face, that their entire being is suffering ten times over. Your face has a relatively small surface area, and in a combat situation ...

Millennials have embraced cause-related marketing like no previous generation. This is when a company pulls the heart strings of a consumer to manipulate them into thinking that they’re not just buying shoes, they’re doing something to help people too. It’s tying the company to a specific cause. For every pair of shoes Toms sells, they give a ...

You can tell a lot about a man by his hair. In the case of Donald Trump, you can tell he is gross, artificial, insecure, ostentatious, and that he is prone to making bad decisions, based on his hair. You can also tell that he is a liar, based on his explanation of what the ...

Whenever a cop shoots an unarmed black guy or pepper sprays a line of peaceful protestors, the default response is a variation of “There are a few bad apples, most cops are hardworking good people.” The ones that I’ve met have been, by and large, total dick bags. Puffing their chests out, parading around the ...