Over/Under will he be fifteen years of age? I’m taking action on any bets. Elon Musk, the buffoonish self styled Bruce Wayne/Tony Stark ripoff, who masquerades as a genius, named his son X Æ A-Xii. So interesting. Bro, you are so fucking interesting.
He did this along with his girlfriend Grimes, who desperately wants to be edgy but in fact is just a droll Canadian in frizzy drag.
I would take action on the matricide, but she and Musk will be separated by that point, as she is, impossibly, by far the coolest person in the relationship.
She’ll be long gone because Musk, in his infinite wisdom, doesn’t know that she got pregnant so as to have a fork in his finances for the rest of his natural born life, which will end the same way as yours.
He will not be downloaded into a computer, or any of his pedestrian Phillip K Dick rehashings that he rambles about while pretending to be at a slight loss for how to put his profundity into terms the layperson can understand – when in fact he’s just doing his best to explain things he didn’t actually think of.
Maybe he will scan his brain onto a flash drive but I predict it will be accidentally overwritten by his worthless son’s USC thesis paper on the semiotic significance of Post Malone’s dick tattoos.
This is wishful thinking. The kid will be dead of a Fentanyl enema by then, never having stood a chance. His own parents used him as a publicity stunt upon his entry into this world, and they used him so that they could purport to be unique.
They’re trying so desperately hard that they couldn’t come off as more regular if they put on matching Old Navy vests and dry humped at a Buffet concert.
According to the imbecilic narcissists who produced the boy with their genitals, the X stands for an unknown variable, and the Æ is “AI”, except, according to Grimes, spelled in Elven. How do you say idiot cunt in Elven?
Then the Xii is roman numeral for twelve, as Grimes explained, the A-12 is the couple’s favorite aircraft. “No weapons, no defenses, just speed. Great in battle, but non-violent.” He’s going to be great in battle in court when he emancipates himself from you two retards.
Also the Xii would normally be written as XII and I’m sure they really want to tell you why but unfortunately you’ve already forgotten to care.
So the kid’s name stand for: Unknown Variable, Artificial Intelligence (spelled the Lord of the Rings way), and their favorite airplane.
I literally find sandcastles more thought provoking. I want to ask more questions about the difference between various grades of sandpaper. And I don’t need to sand anything.
I’d rather listen to Nicole Richie talk about scones for six hours than dignify either of these fools with a singular question about the stunt name they gave to their spawn. I legitimately find the taxonomy of head lice far more compelling.
I one hundred percent find Jared Kushner to be more of a “free spirit” than either of these rubes.
Elon Musk was raised in Pretoria, South Africa, as part of a wealthy family, during the height of Apartheid. He exclusively went to Whites Only schools growing up.
He was born to a South African national father, meaning his family’s money is blood money and should be garnished for reparations plus interest.
His father owned an emerald mine in Zambia, and became wealthy off of slave labor. Musk denies this, which is strange, because it is fact. Like Trump, he has invented an origin story, and, like Trump, his followers eat it up.
Musk has never repudiated Apartheid. Here’s a little piece of disinformation he provided on Twitter, because like most people who “run” several large businesses (which is impossible to do from a time management standpoint, especially while doing three hour podcasts and fucking Johnny Depp’s ex-wife) he still has time to be on Twitter all day:
“He didn’t own an emerald mine & I worked my way through college, ending up ~$100k in student debt. I couldn’t even afford a 2nd PC at Zip2, so programmed at night & website only worked during day. Where is this bs coming from?”
It’s news. It came from news. Actual happenings, in the world. Acknowledge that your first investments came from money you inherited from white supremacists, and maybe I’ll follow you on Insta.
I don’t know when people are going to become wise to this guy’s schtick. I’ll stand by my original thesis: the reason Musk is able to dupe people is because his name is Elon Musk, and it sounds futuristic.
That’s it. All of his other shit is bullshit. The idea of a hyperloop has been around since the 1960’s. It’s not new, and it’s impossible to implement. Did you know that there is a bunch of shit underneath the ground of major metro areas?
Point being, do actual geniuses have to try this hard?
Was Stephen Hawking wheeling around talking about Frank Zapa bootlegs and dying his hair pink?
Did George Orwell tote a stupid ass little lapdog around with him?
Did Muhammed Ali have a face tattoo?
Did Abraham Lincoln carry a purse to work one day really hoping someone would strike up a conversation about gender norms?
Did Aristotle have some special annoying drink he ordered such as half regular/half diet?
Did Newton talk about Simulation Theory ad nauseam like a bowl-cutted theater kid in a trench coat who just smoked his first joint?
NO! THEY DIDN’T HAVE TO. BECAUSE THEY WERE ACTUALLY FUCKING INTERESTING!
Guppies.
Fifteen. Over/Under.